1. You feel a burning sensation when you touch them.

2. They emanate with a soft, neon glow.

3. They say “I’m toxic.”

4. You saw them get bit by a radioactive spider.

5. They bleed nuclear waste.

6. When your cat bit them, she died.

7. They live in Chernobyl.

8. They only drink bottles with the label “XXX.”

9. Animals run away from them.

10. They were born in late October to mid-November.